Strife-Making vs Peace-Making

Are you a peace-maker or a strife-maker? The insidious nature of strife is that it often begins with an issue that is a matter of opinion instead of sin. There are times we become concerned as Christians about how something “looks” instead of how it “leads” people to Christ.

When strife occurs among believers, the church’s testimony is tarnished and Christ is dishonored. The irony is that creating strife without a focus on sin becomes sin. Are you concerned about how something looks instead of how it points to Christ? Where is your attention?

The Bible warns against strife and reproves those who cause it: Proverbs 20:3, “It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling.”

But avoiding strife is difficult; even in New Testament times, strife cropped up in the early church (1 Cor. 3:4; 1 Timothy 6:4; 2 Cor. 12:20). The cause of strife is underlying sin, but the issue creating strife may ironically not include sin at all: James 4:1, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?”

Strife can develop when a difference of opinion becomes the priority in a relationship. Strife is always accompanied by pride and an unteachable or unaccepting spirit in one or both parties. Proverbs 13:10, By insolence comes nothing but strife, but with those who take advice is wisdom.

When someone refuses to consider another viewpoint and demands his own way, strife results. Strife can happen even when we intend to do right. We may not like the actions of others even though it may not be a sinful behavior. It may just be something in which we disagree. Someone bent on strife will not allow compromise, negotiation, or humility. Strife alienates friends, divides families, and destroys churches.

There are reasons God hates strife in His church:

1. Strife destroys unity with church and God. Unity based on the truth of God is so important to Jesus that, in His longest recorded prayer, He praised the Father in John 17:22, “The glory that you have given me I have given to them, that they may be one even as we are one.” Anything that shatters unity is an enemy of the church and God.

2. Strife is contra to love. Nothing we do as Christians is as vital to our faith as love. Being “right,” declaring our version of “truth,” or doing dozens of good, sacrificial deeds counts for nothing without love. Strife cannot exist where love rules. When we allow ourselves to become embroiled in strife, we have said “No” to love.

1 Corinthians 13:1, “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”

3. Strife is hypocritical to the watching world. The purpose of our harmony and love for each other is so that the lost world sees the transformation of Christ in His saints. When we display our pettiness before the world, we show ourselves to be hypocrites. We set up the rest of God’s truth as a target of mockery when we as Christians refuse to honor His commands about strife – particularly when strife is inside the church and becomes known to the world.

John 13:35, “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."

4. Strife alienates new Christians. We cannot expect new Christians to behave like those who have walked with God for years. They’re still wonderfully in spiritual infancy. But when we who should know better fill our churches and ministries with disagreements, gossip, and conflict, younger Christians get wounded. They expected better when they came to Christ – rightly so. Too often the legalistic and licentious behavior of established church members drives away those just starting on their journey with Christ.

5. Strife distracts us from our mission of making disciples. Jesus left us with one clear objective - make disciples of every nation.

Matthew 28:19, “Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.”

Fulfillment of our mission is Satan’s biggest fear, so he keeps us tangled in our own petty disagreements and disputes so that we limit our impact on the lost world. The biggest risk of strife is Christian legalism that distracts and destroys. While the essentials of the gospel cannot be compromised, we can become so dogmatic about nonessential issues that we forget that obedience and love are the marks of a mature believer. We reach others by developing friendships with non-believers, discovering their stories, and discerning when to share the gospel. When we allow strife to distract us from our mission, we fall short of the mandate Jesus gave us.

With social media and various modes of communication at our fingertips, creating and maintaining strife has never been easier. We live in a day of being easily offended. People in our country see themselves as a “nation of victims.” We must avoid this in the church. It has become fashionable to declare our offense about every little thing within and without the church. This has no place in the family of God.

While sin should always offend us, we should never draw lines in the sand and create enemies out of anyone. At times we need to hang out with sinners where sinners hang out. Luke 15:1-2, Now the tax collectors and sinners were all drawing near to hear him. And the Pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, "This man receives sinners and eats with them."

Within the church, strife should be as rare as a snowflake in the Amazon jungle. Strife among the redeemed is inconsistent with who we are as new creatures in Christ. 2 Corinthians 5:17, Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

Creating strife between Christian brothers and sisters is contra to a biblical solution. While it is necessary to expose error and protect the flock from sin, God has harsh words for those who create strife between brothers and sisters. God leaves no doubt in Scripture:

Proverbs 6:16, There are six things that the LORD hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.